The Helper Who Helps the Helpers

What are your roles now? Have your roles changed much throughout your life?

For some people, their roles are clear and set, such as a man who is a husband, father, and salesman for fifty years, and then he is still a husband and father when he becomes a retired salesman and grandfather.

For other people, their roles are unclear and ever changing. Take me for example! In this post I will share about my experiences with roles, and I invite you to share about yours in the comments below.

Beyond my steady roles in relationships, such as daughter, sister, sister-in-law, mother, former wife, aunt, and friend, my roles out in the working world have been unclear and ever changing. If you read my biography (on the About Page, or in the “About the Author” section of my new book, Reaching for Orange: Practices, Visualizations, & Blessings to Help You Happy Up Your Life), you will see that I have trained in many areas… And for many years I wanted to get a masters degree in social work or mental health therapy, but that didn’t happen. For a long time I felt drawn to working with prisoners, veterans, and other highly traumatized populations.

But then I experienced trauma myself.

I had learned all about PTSD (Post-traumatic stress disorder) in theory, but to feel it in my own mind and body was earth-shattering and rocked my entire world. Now that the dust has settled, and I am 97-98% healed from the trauma, I am re-evaluating my roles once again.

I no longer feel drawn to work with traumatized groups. I feel that I need to protect the 2-3% of trauma still remaining in my system. The counselor who I worked with told me that typically 2% of trauma remains even after a person has healed, because the trauma will always be a part of the person.

Some people, who are probably not HSPs (Highly Sensitive Persons) like me, do their own healing and then are able to jump right in and help others who have been through similar traumas. But I don’t know if I will ever be able to work directly with traumatized people… So, I am beginning to think that perhaps one of my roles as a spiritual helper is to support other people who are willing and able to work directly with traumatized people. Maybe I will be the helper who helps the helpers!

Do you work with traumatized people? If so, I bow to you for doing that difficult and important work. Do you sometimes feel like you take in the trauma energies of those you work with? Do you ever feel overwhelmed and need a sanctuary in which to nourish yourself? If so, you are among some of the people who will benefit the most from reading my new book, Reaching for Orange: Practices, Visualizations, & Blessings to Help You Happy Up Your Life. (Please also see my post, “23 Possible Benefits You May Gain Through Reading Reaching for Orange.”)

My current roles beyond relationships are blogger, author, and hospice volunteer. Visiting with dying patients and their families is very rewarding. I enjoy offering spiritual support, and I am not afraid of helping others work with their difficult emotions. I especially love helping others to relax with guided imagery tools.

What are your current roles in life?

 

Orange flower photo by MabelAmber on Pixabay.

 

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Teja’s Virtual Book Launch Week! ~ Reaching for Orange!

Happy Monday, Dear Reader…

Welcome to Virtual Book Launch Week for my new book, Reaching for Orange: Practices, Visualizations, & Blessings to Help You Happy Up Your Life… Now Available for Order on Lulu! (It will be several more weeks until it will be available on Amazon, and it will help me greatly if you will order now on Lulu!) ~ The Facebook Event is being rather glitchy, but I am persevering!

Are you feeling depleted, stressed, or overwhelmed? Are you feeling burnt out or experiencing disharmony with others? Are you upset about the current state of the world? If you answered yes to any of these questions, I wrote this book to be a healing sanctuary for you, and I really hope you enjoy it!

People typically reach outside themselves for happiness and healing. In Reaching for Orange I share tools for reaching inside to replenish yourself and to happy up your life. Through reading this book, you will learn practices to find relief from stress or difficult emotions passing through you, and ways to connect with the Divine Source of healing energies inside you.

From the back cover of Reaching for Orange:

“Reap the benefits of Sister Teja’s many years of daily practices, in-depth studies, and expensive workshops, in the comfort of wherever you are, for only ten dollars. This book was written for people of all faiths by a spiritual helper who is not ordained by any religion, but who is a self-proclaimed nun forging her own Shakahara StarFire Tribe. Teja Shankara is trained in relaxation techniques, guided imagery tools, energy healing, and meditation practices. She is excited to share and to be helpful. Teja prays that this book will help you to happy up your life!”

Please order your copy today! And after you order on Lulu, please leave a comment to let me know that you’ve ordered it… I am really looking forward to hearing about your experience with this book… And perhaps you will consider writing a review after you read it! That would be super awesome!

May you feel happier and happier, every day, in every way!

With Much Love,
Teja

ReachingForOrange_VirtualBookLaunches_StarFireTeja

 

What to Do with Difficult Emotions When You Cannot Stop to Tend to Them

Dear readers, today’s post is a follow-up to my blessing on Friday, “May You Be Willing to Do the Work When the Work Shows Up,” in which I wrote about facing your juicy triggers when they arise. That post was oriented towards weekend time, when you have more flexibility to change your plans…

But what do you do when those difficult emotions arise when you have to work or you have an appointment that cannot be rescheduled? I will share a few tips here, and I would love to hear other strategies that work for you…

When you cannot stop to tend to difficult emotions, it is helpful to cultivate the witness consciousness. Harness the observer part of you, and say to yourself, “I see there is a difficult emotion passing through me now.” Take a moment to acknowledge that you do not have time (yet) to address the emotion… Then have your neutral witness part assure the upset part that you will tend to it just as soon as you can…

Another tip is to take short breaks from your obligations in order to have power cries. You know, like a power snack or a power nap, only it is a power cry… Crying, even for a short time, can really help you to let off some steam and to relieve some pressure from those sweet little emotions that you don’t have time (yet) to process… I did this myself many years ago when I was brokenhearted after a relationship ended: during the day at work, I cried hard for 1-2 minutes during each restroom break, and then I returned to my desk smiling…

What do you do when you cannot stop to tend to difficult emotions?

 

Orange tree photo from Free-Photos on Pixabay.

 

 

StarFire Teja’s StarFire Friday Blessing: May You Be Willing to Do the Work When the Work Shows Up

 

May you face difficult emotions with courage.

May you remember that emotions are just energies passing through.

May your weekend be blessed with authenticity and bravery and comfort.

May you be willing to do the work when the work shows up.*

 

Dear reader,

When difficult emotions arise, do you tend to run away from them and fill yourself with distractions? Or do you stop everything and tend to them?

In my experience, when difficult emotions arise, if I try to push through and carry on with my plans, I find that I cannot enjoy myself… So I think it is better to just stop and tend to the emotions first. That is called doing the work when the work shows up.

The thing is, our natural human tendency is to push away pain and seek pleasure. But, the things that really bother us are points of inquiry. Our triggers are actually very juicy and when we lean into them fully, by asking why and how questions, then they often will bear very sweet fruits!

So, my dear reader, my blessings for you this weekend are to face your juicy triggers. If you tend to run away from difficult emotions, make it a new practice to stop and tend to them. Surrender to the energies passing through you. If something is upsetting you, ask why and how, and then listen deep within for the answers.

If you currently do not have any difficult emotions passing through, thank your happy stars and enjoy your weekend plans!

This weekend my plan is to work on the final stages of publishing my new book, Reaching for Orange: Practices, Visualizations, & Blessings to Help You Happy Up Your Life… Well, that is my “plan” but since there have already been a few delays to publishing this book, I just have to trust that it will happen in “right timing” which I sure hope will be this weekend! 🙂

See you all back here on Monday…

With lots of love,
Teja

* Please see follow-up post on July 23rd: “What to Do with Difficult Emotions When You Cannot Stop to Tend to Them”

 

Oranges photo by Julie Aagaard on Pexels.

 

Dalai Lama Calls for Tackling Difficult Emotions

In his birthday message last week His Holiness the Dalai Lama said, “Much of the turmoil we witness across the world occurs because people are overwhelmed by disturbing emotions that can be difficult to tackle. I believe that the rich understanding of the workings of the mind and emotions that we find in ancient Indian traditions remains relevant today. There would be great value in examining and applying this as a basic human discipline, and not from a religious point of view. Just as we teach physical hygiene to stay physically fit, we need to cultivate emotional hygiene, learning to tackle our destructive emotions, so as to better achieve peace of mind.”

The Dalai Lama also expressed that he would be grateful if we would like to help him in sharing these ideas with others. For me, as a spiritual helper, his words resonated deeply, because I feel like I am already doing the work that he calls for… I am very inspired to help others in tackling their disturbing emotions.

Do you struggle with difficult emotions? If so, I hope my blog posts are helpful to you… And, I am really looking forward to sharing my new book with you, because it is really in alignment with the Dalai Lama’s call for us to tackle those destructive emotions.

Recently I made a list of 23 possible benefits you may gain through reading my new book, Reaching for Orange: Practices, Visualizations, & Blessings to Help You Happy Up Your Life… I will share that full list with you soon, but here are a few benefits that are related to the Dalai Lama’s request… When you read Reaching for Orange, you will learn tools to help you ~

~ work effectively with anger.

~ ease loneliness, depression, and despair.

~ release traumas that you have absorbed from others.

~ find comfort and peace during times of grief.

To learn more about my new book, which will be published soon, please read my post “Double Coffee Days Ahead.”

To read the Dalai Lama’s full message, please click here: Dalai Lama’s Birthday Message.

 

Photo of Dalai Lama from his Facebook Page.